Sometimes It's Okay

[first post without a number in the title! say jiggawhaaat?]

I've been listening to a lot of my old favorites lately.
I wonder if it's a subconscious desire to change back to the way I used to be
before this all just started spiralling out of control.
I guess it's just that age, that time, that year that life that ... something.

I don't like making decisions, I'm incredibly indecisive
and it takes me at least an hour to decide whether or not
I want to shave my legs or maybe
if I should do this instead of that.
How the hell am i supposed to know then what all the choices
I should be making for the future?

I used to know what I wanted, or at the very least,
I was okay with not knowing. I wonder when everything just stopped being
what it was supposed to be.
It's like I regressed back into childhood- i went from a little girl with the mind of a little old lady
to a little old lady with the mind of a child.
Don't people usually call that crazy?
I'm not crazy.
Though my mood swings have been?

Up down Up down
down
down
down
Water water everywhere, but not a drop to drink.
Well, that was my whine for the week,
time to suck it up and
get back on track
[whatever that means].

Confusion with a Capital 4

I never knew I was a zombie when I woke up. I'm usually so chipper in the mornings- why are naps different? Screw you , REM sleep.

I wanna go someplace where I can't speak a bit of the language and just sit there to listen.
I don't care if none of this really makes sense, and no I'm not drunk or high, just extremely tired.
I just want to sit and watch life pass me by, no decisions, no motivation, just.. being. I wanna just exist for a little while, take a break from the grind.
I'm tired of people.
Just tired.
You know the feeling.

I make a lot of bad decisions lately, and I've changed a lot.
I'm not sure what to think about it.
Yayy hormones.